When I first started going out with my boyfriend, I gave this passport-sized picture I took for AAJ purposes as a joke. He kept the picture in his wallet, ever since. I only see the picture occasionally when rummaging his wallet when I'm bored and times like that.

Today he sent me the picture; he scanned it on computer and sent it to me.

Boy, when I see picture, I really can't help reminiscing those years.

Those were the years I learnt so many things; good and bad. I was only 18; I saw only the colorful side of life.
I looked happy then.
I wonder what has changed since then.

I remember taking this picture during one of me, Jannah and Jua's outing to Mid Valley - though I can't really remember for what, but it has something to do with AAJ. I had no idea you're not supposed to smile so brightly on these type of pictures, hence the wide smile. I remember being so ashamed of letting people see this pic when everyone else's were all serious-looking. I looked like a kid about to be given her precious candy.

Those were the years I first started wearing color contact lenses, after years of wearing clear ones.
Those were the years the three of us used to go out to Times Square/Mid Valley/KLCC during weekdays; never taking into account we have test or lecture whatsoever the next day; we just wanted to get out of there. 
Those were the years when me and my boyfriend began to learn everything about each other; the priceless attempts to impress one another. God, that was embarrassing.
Those were the years we had our first fights. And being teased by our friends. Embarrassing case number two.
Those were the years I never cared about what the guys think of me; I have my best set of friends and that was it. RPKJ 24 girls were nothing but awesome; regardless which set of groups you belong to you can still go have dinner at the cafe together and be totally comfortable with each other.
Those were the years we'd go to the pasar malam near University station and break fast together.
Those were the years I truly had my fun; and being stressed about study at the same time.

I looked so happy then. I miss those years.

Thought I'd post up some pictures of my new house :) 
It's bigger than I thought, and definitely better than the old house. My bed is in the room at the back, and I have *ehem* a larger space to watch TV!!

And a bigger wardrobe. Thank you God. 


Yes, that's my kitchen's wallpaper. I don't know how to put it; it's unique but weird. I mean, they could easily just put flowery wallpaper, but no, they opted for ones with birds instead.

But truthfully, it's kinda a nice feeling having 'nature' all around me :)

So anyone who wants to come to Hiroshima, you can stay with me. Anytime. Just don't be terrified of the wallpaper.

This is meant to be a friendly reminder to myself in the future.

Sometimes I wonder how much exactly we women/men spend on fashion and clothes and bags..in a year. (I'd go by month but it won't be effective.) Hundreds, thousands maybe. 

Using all portions of our hard work earned money on fashion is a wonderful feeling at one point, but why not spend it on something that last, and means more to life? Something that gives something to the Earth, that makes not only our lives but also others' much better? Why not use the money to go on vacation/holiday with our family and friends; think of the memories that'll last forever. Think of the contented, wonderful feeling you share with your loved ones.

Sure, giving expensive presents and gifts to them would also make them happy, but in a whole other perspective.

Which one would you prefer?

I do regret spending money on all those ridiculously pricey clothes, bags etc; but the power of mass media is unstoppable. I'm such a hypocrite; I realize all these things and yet I'm still wasting money on things I want at the first time I saw them. It's a disease; I saw House Of Harlow has a new footwear line and 2 minutes later I'm googling Rakuten if they had the gorgeous white fish skin platform pump and the brown snake strap sandals. It's becoming a bad habit and bad news to my credit card statement; but we never learn.


Why not just donate a portion of our money to those who need it more; people who'd be more than thankful if they just own a pair shoes or clothes or even a home. Everytime I see them I can't help but feel ashamed of myself; at least for a quarter of their unhappiness we should be able to do something about it, but instead we go on and buy another Gucci bag we didn't need and two pairs of Zara jeans we hardly wear.

I'm still a hypocrite, I'm still buying things I don't need but I hope along with this remorse, liberated feeling while writing this I will be better later in life; when there will come the time where I'd rather be my own style rather than going after everything they feature in magazines and be contented with my own self.

When Akhirat comes, Allah will ask us 5 questions when we face Him.
  1. Your life; and how you lived it.
  2. Your youth; and how you utilized it.
  3. Your knowledge; and what you do with it.
  4. Your money; and where you got it.
  5. Your money; and how you spent it.
I shudder at these thoughts; I don't know how I can ever justify all the useless things I bought from the last 5 years in front of Him. The things I bought with the money that I could've used to feed the poor man I come across every now and then.

I hope later in life I will enjoy sharing things I have with those in need, and will never have the regret feeling that I should've done it earlier.

I've been MIA from school and spending time at home since last Wednesday, due to high fever and sore throat.

When I say sore throat, I don't think the word 'sore' did it justice.

My throat is worst than sore. It's swelling and bleeding and every time I throw up I can see blood..gross

I freaked out at first because I've never had anything like this before; I've always known I have a problem with my tonsil, it'll get swollen whenever I have a slight fever but it has never been this critical. Swallowing my own saliva is an agony :(

Today, thankfully I feel better, the fever is gone but my throat still hurts. And it sucks because I can't eat or even drink; it feels like something's torturing my throat's tubey thing. 

Throwing up every other hour doesn't help, either.


Doctor gave me 4 types of medicine, and just reading what they're for freaked me out even more - cough, high fever, ulcer and bleeding.

And then comes my knight in shining armor.


I asked her if she knew anything about my symptoms, if she learned anything about it since she's a medic student, and been spamming her twitter to ask her. She's been so nice helping me out about the condition I'm having and things I should do..etc.

Thank you so much Miss Doctor, you've really helped me calm down and understand what I'm having right now. I love you so much! :)

I feel so cool, talking medical terms with her like that. Hehe. If not for my sore throat, I would've feel so much better now.

We had our annual Malaysian in Hiroshima hanami last weekend. 

It was raining; probably the first time we ever had hanami under the roof, usually we're big on barbeques and open wide space, kids running around and grownups playing football (or soccer, whichever holds the closest meaning, I'm no sports fan) but this time it felt different.

"最後の思いで"

Hahaha. This rings true to my ears.


(Picture taken from Basha's Fb)


And I've decided. 
I am not going to continue working/doing Master's degree in Japan.

I've been contemplating on pursuing my Master here, secretly. Partly because I know how hard it is to aim on high-profile companies when you just have a degree in your hand and having to compete with those with Masters, and partly because I feel that it's such a loss when I've come a long way; four years, so why not bear for another short two years and get a Master?

I've also thought about working in Japan. 50% because the salary is way higher than Malaysia, and 50% because of this.

This, is the Chanel 2.55.

I've had it all planned. Upon graduation, I would pack my bags and go to Tokyo/anywhere close to the city, I would have gotten a job at any of Japan's company, I would get a minimum salary of 200,000 yen per month (I was told it's the minimum salary for engineers in Japan, compared to only RM3000+ for starting salary of engineers in Malaysia) and my FIRST salary will go to buying this beautiful creature.

Except I'm just too exhausted from these three plus years being here, and I just don't think I can handle another two years.

I've come to realize that money can't buy happiness. Malaysia is where my heart is.

But maybe if I'm happier now, I'd have applied for companies my sensei suggested.

So for now, this beautiful creature would have to wait.

Anyway, my friend had recently questioned about these overpriced bags girls seem to be obsessed about. He said he just can't understand what's the fuss is about; for him he'd rather buy the most high-tech DSLR than a Chanel bag. You see, this is where guys and girls are different.

I love the Chanel 2.55 because of its history and the inspiration behind its design. Even in Nina Garcia's book "The One Hundred", she said if you ever want to invest in bags, the bags should be The Chanel 2.55, The Birkins by Hermes, Louis Vuitton Speedy, and The Jackie O by Gucci.

But I have a feeling, when I do have money I'd think twice before purchasing all four of them..it's different when you have to work to earn money, than using your parents' credit cards.

But I'd make sure I'll have my own Chanel 2.55 someday, and sign the cheque myself. 

I got a new haircut last month, after what feels like forever of not cutting my hair. 

All these while, it's kind of difficult for me to find the perfect haircut that suits my face shape - I have a round face, high cheekbones (according to most people) and short neck. At least I believe I do.

So as much as I enjoy having my hair being pampered at the salon, figuring out the suitable haircut for me is suicidal. 

But when the stylist at the salon said he'd give me a fringe, I didn't take long to say yes. I really don't know why; maybe because the last time I had one was when I was umm 5 years old and my mum became obsessed of turning all my sisters' head and I into what seems to look like an orange.


Hairstyle disaster days. See the zigzag pattern? Yeah, my mum's fault.

All these while I thought people with round face shouldn't get bangs, since it'll enhance the width of the face (if the fringe is too short) thus will make the face even rounder.

But these celebs prove me wrong.



If you have round face, I think it's best if you get a side-swept bangs, like Ms Nicole Richie here. ;) Apparently you can get DIY Nicole Richie's side-swept bangs style under 5 minutes, according to Youtube.

And don't listen to everything people say, they can be wrong. If you think you look best with it just go with it.

This entry is decades late.
We went to Disneyland late last month to celebrate our birthday :)

Well, not exactly. After he had his kengaku we figured it'd be stupid not to go to Disneyland since we both haven't been there (we went to Disneysea on summer 2008, I think) so we booked two hotel rooms at Disneyland.


No, not this one.

I'm paying for a one guest room, and I'm not exactly printing money as a living so we chose the cheapest room we can get. Haha.


The bed was full with my bags (yeah I'm messy like that) so I won't show you that side of mine. Hehe.
The next day we were at the Disneyland gate by 10.30 am, and the kind ticket guy at the front told us the tickets have sold out. For that day.

I honestly thought he was joking.

I was so frustrated I felt like I could cry there and then!!!! Imagine being on the bus for 12 hours straight only to find we cannot get inside the park!!
He was frustrated too, but I guess he's just more composed than I am. I was determined to wait outside the park (the kind ticket guy said the counter will reopen at 1 pm) but he said there's no way we can get in.

So we went to Disneysea instead. For the second time.

Thank God it was fun :) Thank God there were no more incidents whatsoever, the only downside was I had to hold my tudung the whole time because it was so windy.

MUAHAHAHA

I learned a lot from this trip. Never ever forget to double check the availability of everything - even how capable you think you are.

Him : So you know what you learn from this.
Me : What.
Him : Your boyfriend is always right.

He accused me of being the reason we couldn't get there earlier because I took too much time getting ready, bla bla bla...pfft.


But I know this incident really tested him, and our relationship. I know he was upset with me, and I was upset with him too because in my head I was accusing him for not booking the tickets earlier. But we managed to spend the day like we initially wanted - regardless the place.

I think I'm lucky enough to have a boyfriend who still loves me despite having the urge to kill me due to annoyance I caused him. Hehe.

At least now I have a reason to visit Tokyo again the next holiday ;)

So this is what I did, the whole day today.


This thing you see here consists of a hydrocyclone, temperature control device, mixture dispenser, bla bla..I still haven't recognize each and every single thing yet.

I won't bore you with the lesson, just click here if you ever want to know about hydrocyclone.

Reached home at 7 pm today, and from now on I'm gonna have to get used to going to lab when the sun still shines and having a heart attack of how fast time flies when going out of the lab and it's pitch black. 

This is my life for the next 11 months.

From these few weeks, I realized that I've overestimated the amount of control and knowledge I would have over the whole process of my research. I learned so quickly that while the lecturers and senpais will often pretend they care for your input, this isn't necessarily the case. And that it seems like nodding and saying "I understand" is much less dangerous in most situation. And that showing up early is "polite" for the guys but "necessary" for the girls. That staying at your table for 4 hours straight doesn't count as productive.


Sorry, ranting calls.

Today we had our hanami at Kagamiyama Kouen, located just a few miles from dai.

Though I hardly know each and every single person in my lab, yet; but it was great! (minus the weather) We had sushi and something that looks like fried rice; I forgot what it's called. It's definitely not fried rice because it tasted different, but basically I think it's mainly a mixture of rice, carrots, some veggies and ebi. (Have you ever had anything like it?? Please please tell me what's the name, thanks..it's been bothering me all night -_-)

They had to make a special seafood dish of sushi for me, which I barely touched because it was freaking freezingggggg I had my hands inside my jacket the whole time.


The girls
Pretty sakuraaaa :)
With the labmates and senseis (see, I'm not kidding when I said my senpais are seriously good looking)
We were there until at least 6 p.m and, God, we were freezing. So freezing that we had to join the other labs who made BBQ just to get warm while the guys had their beer and cigarettes. The wind didn't help either. I wish I wore more clothes even though I had my winter jacket on. AND IT'S ALREADY APRIL, for heaven's sake.

I seriously do not want to wear three layers of clothes to school again thank you very much!!



Thank God tomorrow's warm.

I'm sitting at home, still trying to figure out how this internet thing at my apartment works.
Everytime I open Mozilla Firefox/Internet Explorer, the "server not found" thing pops up. And when I checked the internet, it's still connected.

STUPID cheap internet provider!!!

I've been putting off blogging for a few days for the sake of nice pictures, since all the pictures are with him, and my phone's pictures are not, well, as pretty as digicam's. And since last night my hands have been itching to write at least ONE post on this blog, so I decided to try this Blogpress app on my phone.

I doubt that it's the same as Blogger in terms of the quality of font and everything..but this would work for now. I think. I PRAY TO YOU, GOD.

Anyway, I went to Tokyo last week. It was marvellous fun!! I strolled along Shinjuku's street by myself, went inside Zara 3 times, spent half the day at Takashimaya, and 3 hours at Kinokuniya..what more can be the best day than this :) Though poor Bridgestone having to pay him double the price of both our tickets. Haha.

He had a kengaku at Bridgestone's office in Tokyo, the main reason of our trip. While he had the visit to their factory and main office bla bla bla, I had a quality time by myself at one of the busiest city/shopping heaven in Japan. Though it was scary at first since I'm not this Tokyo city girl, I survived! Haha. But the main point is, I'm more proud of him as ever. He went around looking for companies to apply all by himself, asking his lecturer, going to dai back and forth and filling the forms and all..and he got to the Bridgestone kengaku stage, all by himself. I'm so proud of him, also because he managed to get to final year at one of the finest universities in Japan. He always said he was worried about his result and all, but I always knew he can make it.

So here it is, sayang. Congrats on being a kenkyuusei now, I am so proud of you!! :) Just remember to mention me in one of your resumes..hehe.

And thanks for being the weirdest boyfriend ever :





He took me to have dinner at this Asian restaurant with beryanis and belly dancing.
On my birthday.
HAHA.
I'm kidding, he didn't know there's belly dancing.

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