money talk.

Having been spending time at home, I realize how much I value every single second of it now. My career kicked off about 3 months ago; the months I've dreaded so much for draining my energy and taking away the sweet time I used to have as a student (albeit taking engineering, pfft) so these past raya week was probably the happiest I've ever been.

And now that it's coming to an end, I realize I can't let my old habits kick again. The same old blues. The same old depressing thoughts.

And the most important thing, to start learning how to save my pay salary for a better use.

If there's one thing I feel proud of myself for the last few months is; I hardly shop anymore, like I used to. No, let's rephrase. I hardly shop aimlessly anymore. Can you believe that in my current wardrobe, all the tops I have are all the ones I brought back from Japan? Yes, not a single new top since last March.

*patting back mercilessly*

Not a single new dress. The only new stuffs are just scarves (that's a GIVEN) and kaftans (for friends' kenduri).

So to say I'm proud of my recent spending is an understatement.

Of course, I'm dying to go over to Zara and MNG and scramble their racks. But I think having been overly busy with work is actually a good thing - I don't have the time to shop (never thought I'd say this). Of course, I'd love to finally click the 'buy' button on the many gorgeous tops and dress on Net-a-porter's website; but somehow there's this sense inside my head that gives me a second thought.

I don't know who's this person I'm turning into. But I'm glad.

Spending a few bucks on new tops doesn't hurt, I think. But when you're overly spending on things that you know you'd wear once or twice, or things you'd wear just to please someone, or things you want because you saw the ad in the magazines when you know you'd hate yourself if you wore it; is the real problem. I've been there. And not a single day gone by without me looking at the clothes and think, "I wish I'd bought tops and dresses that I actually love and would wear every single day without getting tired of it."

It's all about that little voice in our heads; the one that we can choose to listen to or not. "Buy things that make you happy, not proud" - is probably the best advice someone gave me so far.

"Many people define themselves by their stuff; the brands they wear; the type of car they drive. Know who you are inside, minus all the labels."

So let's start making the future real.